this shirt would fit if it weren’t for boobs: a tragedy
that shirt would fit if i had boobs: the sequel
this shirt fits perfectly because my boobs are the right size: the fanfiction
my shirts always fit: a man’s tale
what shirt: a nudist au
E.T., what about E.T.?
That moment when Jeremy realises he’s in his 40’s.
This is all me.
all these nice ass blood moon pictures
The joke that Bender tells but never finishes (while crawling through the ceiling) actually has no punchline. According to Judd Nelson, he ad-libbed the line. Originally, he was supposed to tell a joke that would end when he came back into the library and said, “Forgot my pencil”, but no one could come up with a joke for that punchline.
Did they just make up this entire movie on the spot.
Dylan - MTV Movie Awards ‘14
that would make the funniest fucking story ever. Due to a mix up at the factory, the template for incantations that was supposed to a publishing company of dark art books is sent to a feminine products factory. Girl then accidentally summons Satan with period blood. Satan gets confused because its “dead blood” and when he shows up he realizes the sacrifice was done incorrectly so he cannot take the girl’s soul but now is bound to do her bidding because oops his bad, he showed up anyway.
word-is-art look at this
"begin your essay with an interesting fact or quote"
im gonna fucking ACE this essay
d’you think the avengers ever play a game where they try to push steve’s buttons and get him all riled up and patriotic?
tony casually throws it into a conversation like “oh yeah I don’t vote” and steve trails off mid-sentence and gapes for a second before he starts in on the importance of the democratic process and how dangerous it can be if citizens give up their say in how the government is run and tony is trying so so hard to keep a straight face
meanwhile bruce is standing in the background timing the speech with his watch because whoever gets the longest rant wins a little trophy that tony made. the current holder of the trophy is clint who managed to convince steve that he doesn’t pay taxes